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Today I want to talk about weight stigma. In case you’re not familiar with the term, weight stigma is an assumption about (or prejudice toward) someone based on their size or weight. This could include things like assuming that someone in a larger body is sitting around eating all day, that someone in a smaller body is definitely healthy, and that size and weight are conflated.
If you’ve followed me for a while, you’ve probably heard me say this before and I’ll say it again:
When someone comes into my office, I don’t usually weigh them.
The reason is, I’m less concerned with their weight than their:
- Lab values
- Health goals
- Relationship and comfort level with food
- Energy level
- Symptoms (light headedness, brain fog, shakiness, GI issues)
- Perception (or lack thereof) of hunger and fullness signals
- General eating pattern and food choices
Someone’s size or weight doesn’t tell me:
- IF they eat
- How often they eat fast food
- If they have large gaps between meals
- If they are happy with their eating
- What (if any) foods they are avoiding
- How often they eat fruits and vegetables
- If or how often they exercise
- If they drink to excess or smoke
Weight stigma can manifest a lot during the holidays, especially if there are tricky family dynamics.
Here are some examples:
- Grandma Judy wants to make sure you have seconds because you’re “just so skinny”
- Cousin Cheryl gives you the side eye when you go up for dessert because you’re in a larger body
- Uncle Johnny lectures you about exercising “for your health”
So, what do you do when this situation arises?
Some people are able to take the comment and shrug it off, but it might get under the skin of others.
Please know that you don’t owe anything to anyone when it comes to your body. If you feel up to it, you can definitely tell that family member:
- “Please don’t comment on my body or health.”
- “My health is my business (or between me and my doctor).”
- “In our (immediate) family, we believe that all bodies are good bodies.” (Perhaps especially beneficial if children are overhearing this conversation)
- If the conversation is too much or people keep pushing, you have the right to leave.
Try to honor your hunger, fullness, and taste as much as possible with minimal outside interference.
I’d love to hear from you!
How do the holidays impact your eating (or your enjoyment of eating)? What do you do to deal with stigmatizing comments?
If you’re struggling with your relationship with food, please reach out. I’m here to help you eat in the way that feels best to you so you have the energy to live your best life.
Hope you all have a Happy Thanksgiving!